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There are so many themed hotels in Las Vegas that it just wouldn't be right if we didn't spend some time looking through them all. Besides, there's not much else to do here! We're not going to fool ourselves so we'll set aside the entire day and night to check out as many as we can.

It's a very hot and bright day. We look down the Strip both ways and decide to start at Mandalay Bay at the south end. We cross the road and start the trek down through all of the hotels' shopping malls and over-road pedestrian bridges. The Crystals shopping mall is stunning with labels to match: LV, Gucci, Prada. There is a lot of empty space and expensive crystal decorations but not much substance. It feels like it's missing something: people.
By the time we're half-way to our starting point, we come across the local grocery store where we buy some yoghurt with granola and stop for a break in the air-conditioning. I'm starting to think that we're going to need two days to do this tour properly.

We continue on our way to the starting point but the weather is so hot by now that we enter the New York, New York hotel to take a look around. This is a fairly dimly lit hotel with a major focus on the casino,
faux NY-style interior buildings façades, and an indoor/outdoor roller coaster. I'd give this one a 6 out of 10. It's not really flash or amazing to look at and the lack of light makes it seem older than other hotels. I've seen so many bars here that I almost didn't notice the portable bar at the top of the pedestrian bridge outside. The water feature containing the NYFD boat is nice but a little lame. On the bright side, the roller coaster seems to be main attraction and if you wait about ten minutes outside, you may see a glimpse of the roller cars rush by.

Before crossing the footbridge to Excalibur, which strangely looks like a Disney production, we decide to cross the Strip and head into MGM. Inside looks classy but it turns out to be more of a local TAB (betting on horse racing, greyhounds, etc) and blackjack tables with wait lists on televisions. The Rainforest Cafe is here with its fully decked out cave of jungle trees, motorised animals, and growling noises. The crocodile in stage fog has to be a favourite. I'm not sure whether this will be an attempt to avoid the heat outside or just that we're getting used to eating so much: we decide to have an early lunch. Thinking the soup on the menu would be nice, we each order one. I try the Jewish soup with matzo balls, which is a type of unleavened bread. It has a very distinctive flavour and not entirely nice but I could grow to like it. Not satisfied ordering such a small amount at the time, we had also ordered a salad; a ridiculously large salad. All I want is the green lettuce leaf and I keep eating until I shouldn't.

We walk back out into the heat toward our 'starting point,' which we decide by now is our mid-point. We cross over the Strip and then take the pedestrian bridge to Excalibur. This place is a little fancy but a little daggy at the same time. I especially like the posters of Australian Bee Gees and Thunder from Down Under. I'd give this place 7 out of 10: its colourful sand-castle exterior is radically different from other hotels but I can't find anything inside that is terribly exciting. After a quick look around we realise there is a monorail to our mid-point, Mandalay Bay...
yay! It travels express to Mandalay Bay skipping one hotel, Luxor, and then returns with a mandatory stop at Luxor and then Excalibur. Works for us.

Either we can't find the real shopping mall entrance within Mandalay Bay or there isn't one. We give up pretty quickly and catch the fun monorail back to Luxor, the Egyptian pyramid hotel. It is huge but feels so empty due to its shape. All of the rooms are on the inside of the pyramid walls so that higher rooms' balconies have no visibility of lower rooms' balconies; unobstructed views down to the inner floor! There doesn't seem to be much on the floor, though. I'd give this 6.5 out of 10: it's a little dark, boring, and somewhat disappointing when the outside is so amazing. We head back outside and an American couple join us in the shade while we wait for the monorail. The guy looks at the vending machine containing water bottles and makes a snide yet not unwarranted remark of how much they must cost: "So, which limb do I have to give up for a bottle of water?" Las Vegas is an expensive city.
We're at the point where we think we'll never get through all of the hotels. We quickly decide we're ok with that.
We walk and we walk and we walk up the Strip. A little souvenir shopping along the way doesn't hurt, although I need to withdraw some cash from a Bank of America ATM. They're everywhere so it will be easy. I crank up the Internet at half speed on my phone and look for local Bank of America ATMs. There's one in the next block. Google has even provided user comments on its location! They seem to be less than flattering. Commenting on locations is a little odd so I don't pay much notice. The location of the ATM is on the fourth floor of the M&M's store amongst some
blah, blah... I stop reading. I find it, eventually, and have a new appreciation for comments on locations. I can't say I'm impressed with how 'easy' this ATM is to find, as it has taken us a good half an hour to locate it. Just our luck: a lady at the machine already. She seems to be having trouble with her card, as she is getting the PIN wrong. It is uncomfortably easy to see past her head while she reaches up from her wheelchair to use the buttons. I'm not sure whether to ask if she needs help because her every movement is painfully slow. She tries one more time and then decides to put her card away. To my surprise, she pulls another card from her bag and inserts it into the machine. She withdraws $20. I feel relieved. Then, slowly, she takes it out of the machine, puts it away, and pulls out the next card and slowly inserts it. The ATM declines the card by saying it cannot be used in this machine. With the next card she withdraws a $20 cash advance from her credit account. The following card is declined due to insufficient funds. She tries more cards with some that fail and others that are successful. All up, I count nine cards for a total withdrawal value of $60 over a course of twenty-three minutes. If only there were another ATM within walking distance. So now we've seen the M&M's building.

Our tickets from the Divas show indicated that we could get some cheap seats to Nathan Burton's magic comedy show just up past our hotel at the Flamingo. Considering the heat and that we've really just passed our starting point, we decide it's the best course of action. The show is interesting but even better is the comedy interlude part-way through the show. We have a photo with Nathan and then stop for some pizza.

Night is falling and the footpaths are filling with people. Time flies when you're in a big city. There's still one hotel I'd really like to see and night time might be the best time: The Venetian. I want to see the gondolas upon water ways with singing gondoliers so off we trot. It is simply gorgeous, from the travelators that pass you over bridges to the soft-glow lanterns to the Sistine Chapel-like ceiling. This is a beautifully themed hotel. I'd give this extravaganza a 9.5 out of 10; half a mark off because Joan Rivers who usually performs here is out of town at the moment.

On the way back to our hotel, we're treated to the volcano fire show in front of the Mirage. The water show at the Bellagio is impressive and best seen close up but considering we can feel the heat of the plumes of flames from across the street, I'm ok seeing it from a distance.
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